Dear Queenie,

  A relative of mine went to work for my family doctor and I wanted to make sure they would not see my medical records so I requested that my records be kept safe in a way that my relative would not be able to see them. The doctor’s staff said they get many such requests and it would be done.

  Now my relative is making a big fuss about this, claiming they almost got fired and saying all sorts of nasty things about me.

  Queenie, how do I deal with this – and with my relative?—Private patient

Dear Patient,

  It is a good thing you requested that your records be kept safe. How could your relative know about it unless they tried unsuccessfully to access your records? Tell your family that this is standard procedure in the doctor’s office and you did not say anything about your relative to the doctor or his/her staff.

  Eventually the fuss in your family will come to an end, but your relationship with that one relative may never be the same.

Dear Queenie,

  My husband told me once that he sometimes dreamed about having sex with two women at the same time – a “three-way” with me and some other woman, but I told him to forget about it, it was never going to happen. All the same, he still mentions it once in a while.

  Queenie, how can I get him to forget this idea once and for all?—Fed-up wife

Dear Wife,

  I doubt there is anything you can say to end your husband’s fantasies, but as long as it is only a fantasy I do not think you need to let it bother you too much.

  But to give him an idea how it makes you feel, you might ask him how he would feel if he thought you were also fantasising about a “three-way” – with him and another man.

Dear Queenie,

  I just found out that my daughter, who is 15, and her boyfriend, who is 16, have been having sex. I always liked this boy and I’m afraid if I tell them they can’t see each other anymore they will just sneak around behind my back.

  I have talked to my daughter about the possible consequences but I’m still afraid of what might happen.

  Queenie, how can I keep my daughter safe?—Worried mother

Dear Mother,

  You have every reason to be worried. Even if she and her boyfriend promised to stop having sex, their adolescent hormones are driving them and the odds are they would eventually break their promise.

  All you can do now is take your daughter to your family doctor and/or consult Planned Parenthood or an equivalent local organisation (online if necessary and possible) so they can learn how to control the possible outcome of their activity.

Dear Queenie,

  I hear a lot of complaints about people not getting “thank you” notes for gifts they have given or sent. It seems people do not understand that they have to train their children to do this chore, just like all other tasks.

  When my children were small I would not let them wear or use or play with any gift until they had written – and sent – a “thank you” note, even just a short one. And after a certain amount of time, if the note had not been written and sent, the gift would be donated to a charity and my child would never see it again.

  Now they are raising their own children the same way.

  Queenie, what do you think of that?—Proud mother

Dear Mother,

  Good for you!

  And what a good idea for other parents to take heed of.