Dear Queenie,

I don’t have any trouble getting dates and I go out with lots of women, but I’m not interested in any sort of long-term commitment.

Queenie, when do I tell a woman I’m not looking to get serious?—Philanderer

Dear Philanderer,

As soon as you can reasonably mention it. Certainly before you try to have sex with her, which I am guessing is mainly what you want from a woman.

Dear Queenie,

I have been married for more than 30 years to a man I’m not in love with, although we get along with each other all right. We stayed together for the children’s sake, but now they are all grown up and out of the house.

I’ve been having an affair with another man for a couple of years. I just love him, but he’s hard to get along with sometimes. He has a bad temper and tries to control what I do and is very jealous and suspicious of everyone else I know.

I told him from the beginning that I wouldn’t leave my husband because of the children, but now they are grown up he is pressuring me to get a divorce. I can’t stand the thought of losing him, but I also can’t stand the thought of losing my safe home.

Queenie, what to do?—Ambivalent

Dear Ambivalent,

The thrill and excitement of having an affair have allowed you to accept the very unpleasant aspects of your lover’s character. His behaviour will not improve if you leave your husband; on the contrary, it may very well get worse.

Break up with him before that happens, and work on making your marriage as fulfilling as possible.

Dear Queenie,

I’m taller than my girlfriend, but I’m so skinny that I weigh less than she does. She comments about this sometimes and I get the impression that I make her feel fat, even though she has a marvellous figure and isn’t the least bit overweight.

Queenie, do you think she will get over this hang-up?—The Thin Man

Dear Thin Man,

Women seem to have evolved to prefer men who are bigger (read heavier as well as taller) than they are. Try to gain some weight and, while you are about it, do some exercising that will turn the new weight into muscles, not fat.

Your doctor or a nutritionist can recommend an appropriate diet and a professional trainer can recommend the appropriate exercises.

Dear Queenie,

I am currently seeing a guy who spends all day all night on WhatsApp and Facebook soliciting his women friends, some of whom are supposed to be my friends, inviting them out and writing sensual and erotic stuff to them and inviting them to meet with him.

When confronted he denies this. To make things worse he always has condoms in his bags.

Queenie, what should I do, being he is lying when confronted?—Confused ’n Hurt

Dear Confused ’n Hurt,

You should stop seeing him. Even if you are not in a monogamous relationship with this man, he is clearly a liar and he is not likely to change.

And if any of your friends know that you are seeing him and still respond to him, you might want to seriously consider the value of their friendship.