Dear Queenie,
I’m planning on asking my girlfriend to marry me and I’m wondering if I should buy an engagement ring to give her when she says “yes”, or take her afterwards to buy one together so she can choose the one she wants.
Queenie, what do you say?—Fiancé-to-be (I hope!)
Dear Fiancé-to-be,
I suggest you visit a jeweller before you pop the question and ask them to set aside several rings in the price range you can afford. Then, if she says “yes”, you can take her to choose the one she likes best, and if she says “no” you will not get an expensive as well as unpleasant surprise.
Dear Queenie,
My brother owns a shop and for his birthday he gave my son a gift card for the shop he owns.
Queenie, was this in bad taste?—Just wondering
Dear Just wondering,
If your son likes the merchandise your brother sells, no, not any more than a gift of cash or a cheque would have been.
Dear Queenie,
My girlfriend and I have been living together for a couple of years and she talks a lot about us getting married, but I’m not ready for that yet.
Queenie, what can I say to change the subject when she starts that kind of talk? I don’t want to get married, but I don’t want to break up with her.—Reluctant boyfriend
Dear Boyfriend,
Tell her what you have told me – that you just are not ready yet for that kind of commitment. And if she becomes angry and tries to force the issue, beware! That kind of behaviour could be a warning sign of a potential abuser (yes, women can abuse their male partners!).
Dear Queenie,
I’m going to be in high school next year and I haven’t ever had a girlfriend yet, but I know a lot of girls and I care about all of them.
Queenie, when I have a girlfriend, will that mean I have to stop caring about other girls?—Young teenager
Dear Teenager,
There are different degrees of love. When you are ready for a serious relationship, your feelings for that one woman will be much stronger than the feelings you have for girls now, and your feelings then for any other woman. And until that happens, you will not be ready to settle down with just one woman.
Dear Queenie,
My wife has changed a lot recently. She gets mad for almost nothing and throws things and once she even hit me. I talked to her doctor but it didn’t help.
Queenie, what more can I do?—Worried husband
Dear Husband,
Sudden personality changes can be an indication of a serious medical problem. Talk to your wife’s doctor again. And if he (or she) does not take the matter seriously enough, get a second opinion from another doctor.
