Dear Queenie,

  When my husband and I got divorced I got half of everything we owned and my husband is mad about it because he was the one who had a job and brought home all the money. But I never had time to get a job because I took care of our children and helped them with their homework, and kept the home clean and cooked all the meals.

  My ex is a good father and I make sure he gets to see the kids as much as we agreed on, but he still gets mad about the division of our assets and the amount of child support and alimony he has to pay.

  Queenie, should I take less so maybe he will get over it?—Ex-wife

Dear Ex-wife,

  There is no assurance that your ex will “get over it” if you take less than you are entitled to.

  People often do not realise the value of the part you have played in your family life. They do not stop to think what it would cost them if they had to pay an outsider – a maid, a babysitter, a tutor – to do the work you have done. Perhaps an outside mediator could point these facts out to your ex.