Dear Queenie,
My mother treats me and all my brothers and sisters, who are all grown up and out on our own for years now, as if we were still children.
She still tells us what to do and how to do it and how we should think about everything, and if we dare to do different or disagree with her she gets on something awful. It’s so bad we just have as little to do with her as we can, not even on holidays and birthdays and the like, and then she gets on because she says we are ignoring her.
There’s no use telling us to get her to go to a doctor for a check-up, because she hates doctors and even if she goes she doesn’t follow their instructions or take any medicine they prescribe.
Queenie, what more can we do?—Worried son
Dear Worried son,
Has your mother always been like this, or is it a fairly recent change in her behaviour? If the latter, it is possible that she is failing mentally, but unless and until she admits that she needs help there really is not much you can do for her.
However, you might consider professional counselling for yourself (and your siblings) to help you learn to cope with your mother’s behaviour, and possibly how to persuade her to get the help she apparently needs.
