Dear Queenie,
I always send all my grandchildren gifts on special occasions. My daughter's children always thank me nicely for every gift, either by calling me or sending me a thank-you note, but my son's children don't.
My children were raised properly and I always made sure they showed gratitude for every gift the received, but my son isn't doing right by his children and I'm starting to think why should I bother to send them anything if they can't be bothered to say "thank you."
Queenie, should I stop sending gifts altogether or should I maybe make donations to worthy causes in their names instead?—Offended grandmother
Dear Offended,
First you should talk to your son about this. He may be leaving this kind of training up to his wife and she may not have been brought up as well as your own children were.
However, it also might help to talk to your grandchildren directly, explain your feelings to them and tell them that if they do not take the trouble to thank you for their gifts you will assume they do not want to get any more.
And in that case your idea of making a charitable donation in their names might also be a good idea.
