Dear Queenie,
My cousin is making her will and because I’m a lawyer she has asked me for help writing it and she wants me to be the executor.
My problem is that she wants to leave all her money, and she has a lot!, to the local animal shelter.
It’s her money and she has a right to do what she chooses with it, but I don’t like the thought of executing a will that gives so much to animals when there are so many people it could help. I don’t argue with her wanting to do it but I don’t want to be part of it, but I’m afraid asking her to choose another executor would make her angry and I don’t want to spoil our relationship.
Queenie, what should I do?—Her cousin
Dear Cousin,
Tell your cousin how you feel about her plan, continue writing her will, but ask her to find someone else, someone who agrees with what she wants to do, to be executor.
Dear Queenie,
I’m planning on asking my girlfriend to marry me and she wants to design her own engagement ring.
Queenie, should I still give her a ring when I actually propose to her or just wait for her to come up with her own?—Her boyfriend
Dear Boyfriend,
There are no rules about how to propose marriage, and giving a ring with the proposal is not necessary. The engagement begins when the woman accepts, not when she starts wearing an engagement ring. All you need to do is ask her to marry you, and then cooperate with her on designing (or selecting) a ring.
Dear Queenie,
Some friends of ours keep their cats’ litter box in the bathroom next to the toilet. Sometimes when we have to use the toilet the litter box is not clean and smells awful.
Queenie, should we say something to them about it?—Offended friend
Dear Friend,
Yes. Tell them you love to visit them, but it makes you uncomfortable to see (and smell) the litter box next to the toilet, and you do not want to offend them but you thought they would want to know.
Dear Queenie,
I’m a teenage girl, but I haven’t developed a figure yet (flat breasts, slim hips) and my hair is short, so sometimes people think I’m a boy and this bothers me a lot.
Queenie, what’s a polite way to correct them?—She, not he
Dear She, Not He,
Just smile and say (in a polite tone of voice), “I’m a girl.”
Dear Queenie,
Some friends of ours keep their cats’ litter box in the bathroom next to the toilet. Sometimes when we have to use the toilet the litter box is not clean and smells awful.
Queenie, should we say something to them about it?—Offended friend
Dear Friend,
Yes. Tell them you love to visit them, but it makes you uncomfortable to see (and smell) the litter box next to the toilet, and you do not want to offend them but you thought they would want to know.
