Dear Queenie,
I’m 18 years old and I want to go to college, but I have to go to work to help take care of my younger brothers and sisters because my father doesn’t have any money because he spends it all on drugs and my mother lost her job because she started using drugs too.
Us kids live with our Grandma and our uncle, but our uncle has been molesting me and I’m afraid he will rape me if I stay in the house, but if I move out he may start in on my sisters.
I told Grandma about him, but she is afraid to say anything to him because he might move out and then she wouldn’t have any money for her and us kids to live on.
Queenie, how can I keep my uncle away from me and my sisters and get my parents to stop using drugs and take care of us?—Worn out with worry
Dear Worn out,
You can’t solve your parents’ problems. They will have to do that for themselves.
Ask your sisters to tell you if your uncle tries to molest them and tell your uncle you will report him to the police if he molests you any more and/or if he bothers your sisters. If he still molests you, go to the police at once, and call Safe Haven if you need help in coping with him.
Safe Haven and/or the Women’s Desk can help you get counselling to learn to cope with your problems. The Labour Office can help you find a job so you can help your grandmother financially if your uncle stops contributing.
They may also be able to help your grandmother to get other financial assistance for your younger siblings; perhaps have child support withheld from your father’s wages, if he has a job, before he has a chance to spend the money on drugs.
Even if you can’t go to school full time because you are working, you can take some courses part-time and/or at night to continue your education. Ask the university admissions office and the Women’s Desk for advice about that. Perhaps the university can also help you find a job that will allow you to continue your studies. It wouldn’t hurt to ask.
