Dear Queenie,
When I asked a friend of mine whether she wanted to go to a certain event with me she said “no” because it would cost too much, but when I went alone I saw her there with someone else.
Queenie, why would she do me that way?—Offended
Dear Offended,
It is quite possible that the someone else picked up the cost of your friend’s attendance at that event. Assuming you could have afforded it, did it ever occur to you to make such an offer?
Tell your friend you saw her there and see what she says. You probably will know from her reaction whether you have reason to be offended.
Dear Queenie,
My parents are always nagging me about little things and they always want to know where I am going and who with. I try to tell them I’m old enough to take care of myself and they should trust me more, but they get mad and say I’m disrespecting them.
Queenie, how can I get them to lighten up?—Frustrated 15-year-old
Dear 15-year-old,
You can grow up a little and realise that your parents are just doing their parental duty of looking out for your welfare and best interests, and trying to teach you what you need to know to take care of yourself as an adult. If they are being a bit overprotective, that is better for you in the long run than if they were being neglectful.
I suggest you keep a copy of this column somewhere safe and read it again when you are all grown up and have teenage children of your own!
Dear Queenie,
I do not use makeup myself but one of my friends uses a lot, too much I think. I usually don’t say anything to her about it, but one day when she had put on lipstick all the way around her mouth it got a little smeared and made her mouth look huge and funny.
When I tried to tell her how it made her look she just told me not to tell her anything because I don’t use makeup so I don’t know anything about it, and I couldn’t think of a good answer.
Queenie, how could I have answered her?—Speechless
Dear Speechless,
In your place I would have told her, “No, I do not use makeup, but I have to look at people who do and right now I am looking at you and this is what I see ... .”
Dear Queenie,
Recently my wife’s old boyfriend came back to the island for a visit with his family and invited her out to dinner to talk about old times. I told her I don’t think she should go out with him and we had a big argument about it. She insists that their relationship was over long ago and now they are just friends and I am just being jealous.
Queenie, what do you think?—Suspicious husband
Dear Husband,
I think you should tell her you would love to meet her friend and both of you will have dinner with him. I think you will know from her reaction whether you have any reason to be suspicious.
Dear Queenie,
Last week I invited some friends over for dinner. I cooked a lot of food so I could have leftovers to eat for a few days after that, but they all ate so much there wasn’t anything left over.
Queenie, why are people so greedy?—Annoyed hostess
Dear Hostess,
It is reasonable for guests to believe they are welcome to eat everything that is on the table in front of them. Obviously you did not expect your guests to have such hearty appetites.
In the future, if you want to be sure of having leftovers, prepare a lot more food and set part of it aside before you serve the meal.
