Dear Queenie,
My husband and I have been married for 11 years now. We have a four-year-old son and he’s so adorable at times.
But the problem is the romance part is missing from our lives. I feel it a lot, but not my husband. Life has changed a lot since our son was born. It has never felt like the first few months when we were newly married. It all felt like a dream at that time.
But now it seems we’ve become old and I have so many responsibilities that romance is nowhere in our lives. Plus the child takes up so much of our time that it is out of the question. He talks a lot whenever we are together and also needs a lot of attention.
What could help in such a case? Gone forever are the good old days. Romance is nowhere in sight. I really miss the intimacy in our relationship.
Also I feel my husband does not balance the time spent with his son and his wife. I feel very left out at times. He gives too much time to our son and, of course, the rest of the time he is at work. Whatever time we have at home is taken up either by the child, the TV or his PC, so what time is left for me?
And by the way, where is the Women’s Desk located? The exact address.
Thank you, Queenie.—Sad and lonely
Dear Sad and lonely,
Romance often seems to go out the window when the children come along, but usually it’s the mother who is worn out and the father who is jealous of the baby. It takes some effort from both parties to keep it alive, but it can be done.
Have you talked this over with your husband? Maybe he thinks you are too tired for romance and the TV and PC are his way of “giving you some space.”
If that’s not the case, a little seductive effort on your part might help. Get out your sexiest negligee, schedule a sleepover for your son with the grandparents or other relatives, or friends with children around the same age, turn down the lights and go to work on your husband.
The Women’s Desk is located at Front Street #141.
