Dear Queenie,
My mother’s husband molested me and my sister when we were kids and she did nothing to protect us. Now we are grown up with children of our own and she is still living with that man. She claims he got religion and is cured of his nasty ways, but I don’t believe it.
Queenie, do you think we can trust him around our children?—Paedophile’s former victim
Dear Victim,
No. “Getting religion” is not a guaranteed cure for paedophilia.
If you wish to maintain a relationship with your mother, do so in this man’s absence. If your mother insists on having him around, make absolutely certain that someone (and NOT your mother!) is always present to supervise when your children are present.
And I would not blame you at all if you simply refuse to have anything to do with him at all, even if it means excluding from your life the mother who allowed you to be abused.
