Dear Queenie,
My husband and I always gave our children everything they wanted, even if we had to use some of our savings to pay for it, but now that we are retired our income is a lot less than it used to be and we cannot afford to be so generous.
In fact, we could use some help ourselves, but even though our children are all grown up and have good jobs that pay very well and know how we are struggling they have never once offered to help us out. They don’t even offer to take us out for dinner once in a while, but they expect us to invite them to our house for the holidays
Queenie, how do we make them understand that it’s their turn to give to us?—Given out
Dear Given out,
Do not blame your children for the foolish extent to which you indulged them, and do not expect them to give you money now, even if they can afford to do so.
However, there is no reason you cannot explain to them that you can no longer afford to be so generous and from now on they can take you out to celebrate the holidays or you can all stay in and enjoy a potluck meal to which you expect them to contribute.
