Dear Queenie,
My mother treats me and all my brothers and sisters, who are all grown up and out on our own for years now, as if we were still children.
She still tells us what to do and how to do it and how we should think about everything, and if we dare to do different or disagree with her she gets on something awful. It’s so bad we just have as little to do with her as we can, not even on holidays and birthdays and the like, and then she gets on because she says we are ignoring her.
There’s no use telling us to get her to go to a doctor for a check-up, because she hates doctors and even if she goes she doesn’t follow their instructions or take any medicine they prescribe.
Queenie, what more can we do?—Worried son
Dear Queenie,
My mother treats me and all my brothers and sisters, who are all grown up and out on our own for years now, as if we were still children.
She still tells us what to do and how to do it and how we should think about everything, and if we dare to do different or disagree with her she gets on something awful. It’s so bad we just have as little to do with her as we can, not even on holidays and birthdays and the like, and then she gets on because she says we are ignoring her.
There’s no use telling us to get her to go to a doctor for a check-up, because she hates doctors and even if she goes she doesn’t follow their instructions or take any medicine they prescribe.
Queenie, what more can we do?—Worried son
Dear Queenie,
My mother retired and went on pension recently and now she spends a lot of time at our house and it’s driving my wife nuts.
Mom is always trying to “help” by doing things around the house. The problem is she only wants to do things the way she is used to doing them, never mind how my wife wants things to be. She reorganises our cupboards and closets and does chores that the children are supposed to do, like making their own beds.
My wife is mad at her for interfering and she is mad at my wife for not appreciating her “helping.” But what she is really doing is interfering with our rules for the children and making more work for us because we can’t ever find things after she has put them away her way.
Queenie, how can we get her to relax and enjoy being retired? — Frustrated
Dear Queenie,
My mother retired and went on pension recently and now she spends a lot of time at our house and it’s driving my wife nuts.
Mom is always trying to “help” by doing things around the house. The problem is she only wants to do things the way she is used to doing them, never mind how my wife wants things to be. She reorganises our cupboards and closets and does chores that the children are supposed to do, like making their own beds.
My wife is mad at her for interfering and she is mad at my wife for not appreciating her “helping.” But what she is really doing is interfering with our rules for the children and making more work for us because we can’t ever find things after she has put them away her way.
Queenie, how can we get her to relax and enjoy being retired? — Frustrated
Dear Queenie,
My husband is not a good driver. He drives too fast, drives up too close to the car ahead and passes it even when there is oncoming traffic or when he can’t see ahead because of a curve or a hill, talks or texts on his cell phone while the car is moving, or looks around to see the scenery instead of watching the other traffic.
The funny thing is, he gets queasy when I do the driving even though I am a very careful driver.
I have asked him to pay more attention to his driving but he just ignores what I say.
Queenie, what more can I do?—Scared passenger
