Dear Queenie,
A friend of mine just broke up with his girlfriend that I have had feelings for her for a long time, so I sent her some flowers and asked her for a date. She thanked me for the flowers, but made some excuse about the date and hasn’t answered my calls or texts since then.
Queenie, how can I get her to give me a chance?—Lovesick
Dear Lovesick,
Sending flowers to a girl you have never even dated once is going more than a little bit too far. It seems rather obvious that this girl is not at all interested in you, so give her a break and start looking around for someone else who might reciprocate your feelings for her.
Dear Queenie,
There’s this boy I have been friends with since we were in primary school and this last year or so I have fallen in love with him and I think he feels the same way about me, but when I told him how I feel he said it just couldn’t work out because we are going away to college to two different schools in two different countries.
Queenie, is he right or do we have a chance?—Lovelorn
Dear Lovelorn,
I suspect he is right, but not for the reason he gave you. More than likely he just does not feel the same way about you as you feel about him and he was trying to “let you down easy.”
There is always the chance that “absence will make his heart grow fonder,” but do not depend on that happening. While you are away at college, keep yourself open to new friendships and the possibility of a new romance(s!).
Dear Queenie,
My mother died many years ago and my father died recently and now my brother and I are quarrelling all the time over the settling of his estate – who gets what personal belongings, whether to keep his home and rent it out or just sell it and divide up the proceeds, etc.
Queenie, I hate being on the outs with him. What do you suggest?—Bereaved daughter
Dear Daughter,
Trying to handle such matters while grieving for your father’s passing is apparently more than you and your brother can handle. If your father left a will, be guided by his instructions. If not, hire a lawyer to act as executor of your father’s estate and be guided by his (or her) legal counsel.
Dear Queenie,
I’m a receptionist in a business office and I also type letters and reports and do other administrative work. People often have to wait a while for the person they came to see and when that happens sometimes instead of moving away and sitting down they stay by my desk and chat.
Dear Queenie,
My wife is “good friends” with a man she has known for a long time. She says there was never anything romantic between them but the way the man talks about her is something different. Also, they hug each other a lot and kiss on the lips when they meet and say “goodbye” and they have “pet names” for each other.
I trust my wife, but I wish she would tell why they are so affectionate with each other.
Queenie, is she making a fool of me?—Doubtful husband
Dear Husband,
Have you asked your wife about any of the things that are raising your doubts? If so, did she give answers that satisfied you? If not, do so immediately and insist on going into detail. If necessary, have this discussion in the presence of a professional counsellor. Then you will know what to think.
