Dear Queenie,

  When we got divorced my husband got to keep the house where we always lived and raised our children, because it was in his name and he paid me out for what would have been my share, but I got custody of our teenage children, a boy and a girl.

  Now my children want to go live with their father in the house where they grew up and all their friends live nearby and go the same school, especially my daughter who thinks the divorce is all my fault, but my son also wants to live with his father.

  Queenie, I want to do what is best for them. What do you think that is?—Divorcee  

Dear Divorcee,

  Assuming your ex-husband actually wants custody of his children and is a good provider and a good father, it will probably be good for them to live with him in a familiar neighbourhood near all their friends and their school, especially as they are old enough to be given a say in the decision-making process. And especially your son will benefit from having his father’s influence.

  But be sure to arrange to have time with them, as having their mother in their lives is also important.

Dear Queenie,

  My 10-year-old niece is very badly behaved, including that she lies a lot. The problem is that whenever anyone complains to her mother, Mom believes her daughter instead of the complainer, even though Mom knows her daughter to be a liar.

  The rest of the family thinks this is a real problem and the child should get counselling, but the child’s mother (my ex-sister-in-law) won’t listen to us but always takes her child’s side.

  Queenie, how can we get her to get her daughter some help?—Worried uncle

Dear Uncle,

  Whenever an adult is present, which should be all the time when this problem child is playing with other children, the adult should video-record everything that your niece does. It should not be difficult in this day and age of ever-present smartphones and other electronic devices. Then you will have irrefutable proof as to who is lying and who is telling the truth, and perhaps that will be enough to persuade the mother to get her child professional help.

  There is also the possibility that authorities at the child’s school can force her to do so. I am assuming your niece is enrolled in an official public or private school. If not, you should inform the police Juvenile Unit or the Court of Guardianship. St. Maarten law requires that all children go to school.

Dear Queenie,

  I was raised to believe it is good manners for a man to take off his hat or cap when he comes indoors, but nowadays I see men everywhere wearing their hats/caps inside.

  Queenie, have the rules changed?—Headgear Etty Ket

Dear Etty Ket,

  According to the etiquette books, the rules have not changed. However, I suspect not so many people are reading the etiquette books as used to be the case.

  Also, I have noted that in some business establishments, especially those that deal in food, all employees, both male and female, wear hats or caps that confine their hair, of which I wholeheartedly approve, etiquette or not.

Dear Queenie,

  I’m a divorced woman with children who is dating several different men. I am not interested in a serious relationship and I have told them so, but I do enjoy their company and the things we do together.

  My older brother says I need to make a commitment to just one of them or people will not think well of me.

  Queenie, is he right?— Like my freedom

Dear Like my freedom,

  He may be right about some people, but you are an adult and have to do what you think is best for you. And it will be better to continue to enjoy your freedom than to rush into a relationship that you are not ready for and that might turn out badly, just to please your brother.