Dear Queenie,
My husband’s brothers are always offering to take care of our little girl when we want to have an evening out, but I have heard so many stories about children being sexually abused by relatives or close family friends that I am afraid to leave her alone with them.
Queenie, how can you tell if someone is the kind of person who abuses children that way? And how can I refuse to let her uncles babysit without telling them why?—Worried mother
Dear Mother,
Unfortunately, the same things that make a man a good father are characteristics of paedophiles: they are friendly, charming, and good with children.
You can refuse babysitting offers politely by saying something like “Thanks, but not tonight. Maybe when she is a little older.”
And when your daughter is old enough to understand what you are telling her, teach her to come to you when anything does not seem right and not to trust anyone who wants her to keep something a secret from you and her father.
