Dear Queenie,
I’ve gained a lot of weight since I got married and these days my husband hardly ever makes love to me anymore unless I ask him to and sometimes not even then. He says it’s because he doesn’t find fat girls attractive.
Queenie, when you love somebody isn’t it supposed to be for who they are and not how they look?—Neglected heavyweight
Dear Neglected,
The simple fact is that sexual attraction in both men and women is closely connected to physical appearance. Let me ask you: if your husband had gained proportionately as much weight as you have, would you still want to make love with him?
Or has he gained weight too? It could be that the excess avoirdupois is actually interfering with his libido.
And, his feelings may be hurt that you do not care enough about him to try to control your weight and stay sexy-looking for him.
Whatever the reason, you should be trying to lose weight as much for the sake of your health as for his feelings. Perhaps a weight-loss programme would benefit both your health and your sex life – a mutual programme if he also has gained weight.
