Dear Queenie,
I am a 21-year-old woman. I’ve been going with this man who is 12 years older than me for the past 5 years. He lives with his girlfriend for the past six, and during that time he got her pregnant and they have two children together.
His girlfriend knows about me, she even moved out, but then came back.
My boyfriend wants me to have a child for him, but I refuse, because I don’t want my child to have a bunch of brothers and sisters from daddy’s different women. He tells me that I’m selfish.
Now I am getting tired of the situation. I can’t really depend on him and I see that I’m getting old with him and we are not moving anywhere and he is the only one benefiting from the situation (you know, two women at the same time) and I’m tired and sick of it, but yet I love him.
Queenie, what to do? Please help me please?—Desperate Mate
Dear Desperate Mate,
What to do? Wake up smell the coffee!
You admit that you don’t like the situation and your boyfriend is the only one benefiting from it. You say he start seeing you when you were 16 and he was already living with another woman. The only smart thing you have done is refuse to let him get you pregnant.
While he was living with another woman he cheated on her with you. You can be sure he will treat you the same way if you stick with him.
You are not old yet by any means and you do not have any children to tie you down. You have every opportunity to further your education and get a good job so you can support yourself. While you are doing so, you can be looking out for a good man who will not cheat on you or give your children a flock of half-brothers and -sisters.
Face it, my dear, you tied yourself down with this heel when you were still a child and have never given yourself a chance to fall in love with a good man who would treat you the way you have a right to expect!
