Dear Queenie,
For more than two years, I've been doing a particular task at work. Technically, it isn't really in anyone's job description. It was one of those things that fell between the cracks, needed to be done, and I started doing it. Over time, I developed a good working relationship with the department involved, and everything functioned perfectly well. Enter my colleague. This is someone who regularly tells everyone how unbelievably busy she is. Yet she recently decided that this particular task is apparently hers. She didn't mention this to me. Instead, she went to our manager, who is fairly new, and complained that I was doing something that was supposed to be her responsibility. The manager then contacted the other department and told them that from now on they should deal with her instead of me. Nobody spoke to me. I found out because the people in the other department contacted me asking: "What's going on?" That was embarrassing enough. What really bothers me, though, is my colleague. She sees me every day. She has said absolutely nothing. She is behaving as though nothing happened while I now know she went behind my back and made an issue of something I've been doing for two years. Part of me wants to confront her. Another part thinks I should simply hand over the task she apparently wants so badly and let her enjoy it along with everything else she's "too busy" to do. But I don't like two-faced behaviour, and I'm finding it difficult to act normally around her. How do I deal with this professionally without becoming as sneaky as she was? —Apparently I Was Stealing Her Job
Dear Apparently I Was Stealing Her Job,
Your colleague wanted the task. Congratulations. She now has the task. Don't fight to retain unpaid responsibility that was never formally yours, particularly after management has reassigned it. But there are two separate issues here. The task is settled. The way it was handled isn't. Start with your manager, not your colleague. Calmly establish the record: "I'm happy to hand this over. For context, I've handled it for more than two years because there wasn't a clear owner. I wasn't aware there was any concern about that until the other department contacted me after the change." That's not complaining. That's correcting the impression that you wandered into someone else's portfolio and refused to leave. Then ask whether anything is needed from you for a proper handover. And hand it over properly. Not maliciously. No withholding information. No hoping she fails. No continuing to quietly rescue the work when she discovers why it kept falling between the cracks in the first place. As for your colleague, you don't need a dramatic confrontation. If you want to clear the air, say: "I understand you raised the task with management. I wish you'd spoken to me first, since I've been handling it for quite some time. In future, I'd appreciate us discussing these things directly." Then remain professional. You don't have to pretend you trust her exactly as you did before. Sometimes workplace information is useful even when you don't like how you received it. You've just learned that when this colleague has a problem with you, she may not bring it to you. Adjust accordingly. Be cordial. Document things. And most importantly, stop doing her new job. She claimed the parcel. Let her carry it. —Queenie
