Dear Queenie,

My husband and I were married for many years. He was loving, protective, generous and faithful, but all my family saw about him was his temper.

When he died I notified both families, but none of them sent me any condolences. My family claim to care about me, but all they remember about him is bad things.

Queenie, why won’t they let him rest in peace?—Grieving widow

Dear Grieving widow,

When anyone bad-mouths your late husband ask them – politely! – to stop because it makes your grieving more difficult. If they do not stop, get up and leave so you do not have to listen to what they are saying. Hopefully, eventually they will stop, but at least you will not have to listen to them meanwhile.

Dear Queenie,

My husband and a group of his friends have formed a sort of “club” that meets at the men’s homes a couple of times a week. One of the men, who is sort of the leader of the group, says these meetings are for the men only and the women – their wives! – should not be there when the men get together and should leave the house and go somewhere else when the men are meeting.

My husband doesn’t agree with all that, but he is close friends with the other men in the group and doesn’t want to just quit.

Queenie, do you have any suggestions?—Excluded wives

Dear Wives,

My first, obvious, suggestion is that the group should meet at a coffee shop or restaurant instead the members’ homes.

The next suggestion is that the wives have their own get-together – somewhere else! – when the men are meeting.

Also, the wives should stop preparing any refreshments for the men’s meetings. Let the men make their own preparations, or order take-out.

Dear Queenie,

My boyfriend is always losing things like his keys or his wallet or his cell phone. I have suggested that he always keep them in the same place when not using them, but either he doesn’t do it or if he does, it doesn’t work.

Queenie, I’m so tired of searching for his things. Is there anything more I can do?—Fed-up girlfriend

Dear Girlfriend,

Your boyfriend does not do this on purpose and probably is just as fed up as you are. Your boyfriend needs to learn to slow down and think about what he is doing when he puts these things down. Professional counselling might help him learn to organise his thinking a bit better.

Dear Queenie,

There are couple of people I have been close friends with since we were kids, but recently I have been hearing about things they have been doing that I haven’t been included in. I hear about them from other friends or see them posted on Facebook.

I even sat alone on New Year’s Eve while they were out celebrating. When I asked one of them why they didn’t call me to join them, she said they didn’t plan on it, they just happened to meet up when they were leaving work.

Queenie, why didn’t they call or text me to come join them? Would that have been too much to ask if I had known anything about what was going on?—Forsaken former friend

Dear Former friend,

Apparently you and your (former) friends have drifted apart. It is time for you to start getting involved in activities where you will keep busy, meet a lot of people and make new friends.