Dear Queenie,
My husband has put on so much weight since we got married that I can hardly stand to look at him. He used to be very handsome, but now he is absolutely gross! He must weigh close to 400 pounds.
I have tried to get him to lose weight, but he says eating is his only pleasure now. He has no interest in sex, which is just as well because I can’t stand to have him touch me the way he is.
But I still love him and I am worried about his health. Besides, I miss the handsome husband I used to love making love with.
Queenie, what can I do?—Weighed down with worry
Dear Weighed down with worry,
Your husband’s loss of interest in sex may be due to a medical problem that has also caused his weight gain. Or the excess weight may have made him impotent. No matter which is the cause and which is the effect, it is very likely that the problems are inter-related.
Try to persuade him to have a complete medical check-up. If you can’t, or if he goes to the doctor but refuses to follow the doctor’s instructions, insist that he have all his affairs in order.
I’m sorry to be so pessimistic, but if he weighs as much as you say he does, he is a prime candidate for untimely death and you must be prepared to deal with it.