Dear Queenie,
My mother had me when she was in high school and had to raise me alone. She has always told me she doesn’t want me to get pregnant too young and have kids without a father to help raise them.
Now my boyfriend and I have started having sex and I don’t know whether to tell her. We’re not going to make a baby, we’re just having sex.
I have always been able to talk to her about anything, but I’m afraid she will start going on about me being too young and not knowing what I am doing.
Queenie, should I tell her?—Not a virgin
Dear Not a virgin,
Yes, you should tell her. Absolutely!
What in heaven’s name do you think you mean when you say, “We’re not going to make a baby, we’re just having sex”? What else on earth do you think it takes to make a baby?
Your mother may be disappointed in you, even angry, but it is vital that you be examined by a doctor and be taught how to protect yourself from becoming pregnant and from catching sexually transmitted diseases.
You must also learn how to protect yourself from boys who will try to pressure you into having sex when you don’t want to, and from being swept by your own raging hormones into having sex when you don’t intend to.
Tell your mother at once, and listen to what she says. She learned these lessons the hard way and is trying to protect you from going through what she did.
