Dear Queenie,
There is a cold war happening in my office. Literally. The issue is the air-conditioning. Most of us seem perfectly comfortable with the temperature. Then there is one colleague who is always freezing. She comes to work in sleeveless tops and sandals and, by 9:30am, announces: “It is SO cold in here.” Then she gets up and changes the AC. Nobody sees her do it. We simply begin to notice that the room is getting warmer. Someone gets up and turns it back down. Twenty minutes later, it mysteriously changes again. At this point, we have developed thermostat surveillance. You can actually see people glance towards the AC remote when she gets out of her chair. One colleague has started keeping the remote on his desk. She found it. Another suggested she bring a cardigan. She said she shouldn’t have to dress for winter when we live in the Caribbean. Fair point. Except the rest of us shouldn’t have to experience August indoors. The worst part is when she turns the AC off. Not up. OFF. You don’t notice immediately. First, there’s a slight warmth. Then somebody starts fanning themselves with a folder. Then you can feel your clothes becoming part of your body. Finally someone shouts: “WHO TURNED OFF THE AC?” And she says: “I was freezing!” Queenie, we work in an office with several people. Surely one person’s preferred temperature cannot become national policy? How do we resolve this before someone puts a password on the remote? —Hot Under the Collar
Dear Hot Under the Collar,
Every office eventually discovers that democracy has limits. Usually at the thermostat. There is no temperature at which ten human beings will simultaneously declare: “Perfect.” One person is freezing. One is sweating. One has brought a shawl. One has a desk fan powerful enough to affect regional weather patterns. And somewhere in the middle sits the person who just wants everyone to stop touching the remote. Your colleague does have a legitimate complaint if the office is genuinely kept unnecessarily cold. Caribbean offices can occasionally operate as though the objective is to preserve the employees for future generations. But there’s a difference between saying, “Can we agree on a slightly warmer temperature?” and unilaterally switching off the AC in St. Maarten. That is not climate control. That is an act of aggression. The solution is boring, which is generally a sign that it will work. Agree on one reasonable office temperature and leave it there. If there is a facilities or office manager, let that person establish it. No secret adjustments. No thermostat coups. No waiting until Denise goes to lunch and launching Operation 19 Degrees. Then everyone adapts within reason. If you tend to feel cold, keep a cardigan at work. If you tend to feel warm, dress accordingly or use a small fan if permitted. And yes, there is something slightly unreasonable about arriving in a heavily air-conditioned office dressed for Mullet Bay and then demanding that eight other people alter the building’s climate because your shoulders are cold. Bring a sweater. The rest of the office cannot remove additional layers indefinitely. There is a point at which HR becomes involved for entirely different reasons. Most importantly, stop fighting through the remote. Because once colleagues start hiding office equipment from one another, the AC is no longer the problem. And if management cannot establish a temperature everyone can tolerate, I suppose there is one final Caribbean solution. Put the remote in a locked box. Give nobody the key. And let the Lord decide. —Queenie
