Dear Queenie,
When I was 19 I met a wonderful guy and fell in love. We had a brief romance and we were separated because we were living on separate islands at the time. We both went our different ways and married other people, but I always thought of him and wondered how he was doing.
One time after we both got married we spoke over the phone for about 30 minutes or so. We never spoke since then.
Fifteen years later we met again and he was divorced and I was going through a separation. I was living on a different island. We again met and had a short and heated romance and I have been unable to stop thinking of him since then. We still meet occasionally.
I love him and he told me he loves me, but he does not want to be married again because he was married twice before. We continue to see each other at times and when we spend time together it is unforgettable, but what must I do? Should I just let him go and start a new life or do I wait on him until he is ready?
I do not want to be with anyone else. I am now 40. I do not know how much longer I can wait. But one thing I know for sure I love him with all of my heart.
Queenie, do you believe there is that one special person out there in the world for each of us? If so, I believe he is mine, I hope so. —Confused
Dear Confused,
For some people there is one special person. Others have the ability to love more than one person in a lifetime and form memorable relationships, each one different, with several people.
This man has made it clear that he does not intend to marry again. It is possible that he will change his mind eventually, but if I were you I would not count on it.
Therefore you have a choice between spending the rest of your life having an occasional wonderful fling with this man or giving up on him and looking for someone who wants to share his life with you. You are the one who will have to make that decision.
