Dear Queenie,

  A friend of mine bites her nails all the time. It looks bad when she does it and her hands look terrible with the nails all chewed up that way, and of course she can’t get any kind of nice manicure because her nails are so short and chewed-on.

  Queenie, is there any way I can get her to stop doing that?—Concerned friend

Dear Friend,

  It is good of you to be concerned about your friend, but I doubt there is much you yourself can do about your friend’s habit.

  Nail-chewing is usually related to feelings of stress and anxiety, which need to be addressed by a professional counsellor. Perhaps if you can persuade your friend to consult a professional counsellor about whatever is bothering her, the counselling will help her break this habit.

Dear Queenie,

  I’ve been dating a man for a couple of years. We don’t live together but we spend long weekends (Thursday to Sunday) together at his house. He says the rest of the week is when he likes to be alone and I can email or text him during that time but I can’t go to his house and he won’t answer if I call him.

  I don’t really know how he feels about me. If I tell him I love him he will say it back, but he never says he loves me unless I say I love him first.

  I don’t need for us to get married, but I would like to have a full-time relationship.

  Queenie, do you think I have a chance for what I want?—Part-time girlfriend  

Dear Girlfriend,

  No, I do not think so.

  Also, I seriously wonder whether your boyfriend is really spending Monday to Wednesday alone, or if he has another “part-time girlfriend” with whom he spends that part of every week.

Dear Queenie,

  I don't speak Dutch, however, I enrolled my little one in an all-Dutch elementary school with Dutch as the language of instruction in the hopes that the youngster will take to the language and eventually become proficient in it.

  I enrolled the child in a Dutch afternoon school program, we read at home in Dutch nightly for ½ hour, watch appropriate Dutch television programs yet my little one still hasn't caught on to the language after 3 years in the all-Dutch school.

  Now I feel guilty for making the initial decision as the youngster now struggles to keep up. 

  Queenie, can your child fluently speak and master another language in school even if you don't speak that language?—Frustrated

Dear Frustrated,

  As you have seen, sending your child to a school where the language of instruction is one the child does not speak or understand is not a good idea, as the child will not be able to keep up with his or her normal school subjects.

  I suggest you send your child to a school where the language of instruction is one the child already speaks and understands and he/she can do well in the subjects being taught, including, if it is offered, a course in Dutch as a second language. If such a course is not offered in the school, you can send him/her to an afternoon programme where Dutch is taught as a second language.

  And, if your schedule permits, you might even want to join your child in that afternoon programme.

Dear Queenie,

  The women I date tell me they feel safe with me because they know I won’t force them to do anything they don’t want to do.

  Queenie, what are they really trying to say?—Confused

Dear Confused,

  They may be trying to pay you a compliment, or they may be trying to tell you their interest in you is only as a friend – or some of them may have dated men who tried to force them into doing things they did not want to do.

  Ask some of your female relatives and/or married women who are your friends what they think makes your dates react to you like this. Their answers should be interesting.