Dear Queenie,
My boyfriend and I have been thinking about getting married, but recently I found out that he told some of his friends that he would pay for me to get a boob job.
I like the way I look and I don’t think I need a boob job and I certainly don’t want one.
Queenie, what do you think this says about him?—Offended girlfriend
Dear Girlfriend,
I think it says your boyfriend assumes he can make you do whatever he wants. I do not blame you for being offended that he would say something like that to someone else without ever having discussed the subject with you to find out how you feel about it.
Perhaps this will make you think again about marrying him?
Dear Queenie,
Do you think it is OK for a father to ask his grown-up son if he is having sex with his girlfriend? I say it’s none of our business, but he says he just wants to advise them to be careful that she doesn’t get pregnant.
Queenie, what do you say?—MYOB mom
Dear Mom,
Would you still think it was none of your business if the girlfriend got pregnant?
Advise your husband to be as tactful as possible when he talks to your son about this. Perhaps he could ask your son what he knows about birth control and give him some fatherly advice on the subject without asking any questions about his sexual activity (if any) with his girlfriend.
Dear Queenie,
My boyfriend and I have been together for a couple of years and having sex since fairly early on. He always uses a condom, but recently he has started wanting to use the “rhythm system” and do without on the days when we think I can’t get pregnant.
Queenie, we’re too young to have children. What can I do?—Teenage girl
Dear Teenager,
Consult your doctor for advice and possibly a prescription for birth control pills. You should have done this long ago. Condoms are not totally safe; there is always the possibility that one might leak or even break, at the worst possible moment.
Dear Queenie,
When a certain relative comes to visit us he stays in our guest bedroom and wants us to rearrange the furniture so the bed faces in a certain direction (I think it’s a religious thing). We do what he wants, but it’s a lot of work, and when he leaves we have to put everything back the way it was before, which is just as much more work.
Queenie, do we have to do this every time?—Fed-up hostess
Dear Hostess,
As a good hostess you should try to please your guest if possible.
However, as a good guest, he should put the furniture back the way you want it before he leaves.
Dear Queenie,
My grandson is only 2 years old, but when he falls down or bumps into something and starts to cry his father expects him to “tough it out” and “man up”.
Queenie, how do I make his father understand that it is OK for a little boy to cry if he is hurt?—Doting grandma
Dear Grandma,
A small bump should not be treated the same as a major injury, but it is still okay for a toddler to cry over it without upsetting his parents. Even a grown-up man may cry on a serious-enough occasion and nobody will fault him for it.
