Dear Queenie,
We live in a residential area and recently found out that one of the neighbors is running an Internet porn site from their home. None of the rest of us want anything to do with that kind of thing.
Queenie, is there anything we can do about it?—Offended neighbors
Dear Neighbors,
Home-based businesses are usually okay unless there are employees and/or customers coming to the home. A business licence may be needed, but often that is all, depending on the local laws.
A local lawyer can answer your legal questions and tell you what – if anything – you can do about this matter.
I am sorry I cannot be more help.
Dear Queenie,
I’m almost 70 and starting to feel my age, but my children who have full-time jobs expect me to look after their children all day every day. I love my grandchildren, but it’s getting to be too much for me.
Queenie, do you have any suggestions?—Tired grandmother
Dear Grandmother,
What about your children’s in-laws? Can they help out with the children?
There must be day-care and after-school programmes in your community, and some of them should be low-cost or even free of charge.
There should be options that will give you some relief, at least part-time.
Dear Queenie,
My parents have started going out partying all the time and leave me to babysit my younger sisters. When I tried to talk to them about it they just say they are tired of raising kids (they are going on 50 and have 3 kids older than me and 2 younger) and it’s about time they could go out and have some fun.
Queenie, how can I get them to realize they aren’t done raising children yet? What will happen to the younger ones when I go away to university?—Worried middle kid
Dear Middle kid,
Try to get some older person your parents respect – a relative, one of your teachers, your family doctor, a school counsellor, your pastor if yours is a church-going family – to talk to them and remind them of their responsibilities.
If they can afford it, your parents should hire someone to look after the younger children, and they should do it soon so the person can get acquainted with the children and the whole family before it is time for you to go away.
Dear Queenie,
The people who live in the apartment next to us fight all the time, not just loud arguments, but shouting and screaming, terrible language they use on each other, things getting broken (we can hear them getting smashed) and it goes on for hours.
Queenie, is there anything we can do about all this?—Fed-up neighbours
Dear Neighbours,
You can leave a note in their mailbox telling them their noise is disturbing you. Do not sign your names, just “your neighbours”. If that does not solve the problem, you can complain to your landlord, and if that is not enough and you have reason to think someone actually got hurt, you could even call the police during one of these upheavals.
Dear Queenie,
I always thought my parents liked my boyfriend, but now we’re engaged they say he’s not good enough for me and anyway we’re too young to get married (we’re both in our 20s).
Queenie, I thought they would be happy for me. What is their problem?—Unhappy fiancée
Dear Fiancée,
Your parents may be afraid they are going to lose you if/when you get married. Perhaps a trusted family member or friend can find out what (if any) real objections they have to your getting married, and whether their objections have any validity.
I hope in the end they will be happy for you and welcome your new husband into the family.
