Dear Queenie,
In a small restaurant I go to, I noticed a sign that said not to bring in food from another place to eat it there.
Queenie, why do people do this? Isn’t this cheating the owners of the place where they eat?—Restaurant Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
Unless the person also purchases food or drink at the place where they eat, yes, it is an imposition on the proprietors of that place, who have to pay for things they use, like napkins, and for cleaning up after them.
As for why they do this, I have no idea, unless it is because the place where they obtained the food has no facilities for them to eat it there. I would suggest that they purchase their food at places where they can also eat it, or take it home to eat.
Dear Queenie,
My husband gives me gifts on my birthdays and on Christmas, but not on Valentine’s Day. He says it was just made a holiday to get people to spend money.
Queenie, is he right?—Feeling neglected
Dear Feeling neglected,
Valentine’s Day was made a holiday to commemorate two men named Valentine who were executed by a Roman emperor on that day in different years. However, if feeling forced to give you a gift makes your husband feel bad, try to concentrate on everything else he does for you instead of what he does not do.
Dear Queenie,
My brother’s girlfriend, who is a lot younger than us, is all the time on the phone calling or texting our mother. My brother has been dating her for a while, but he says he isn’t even thinking about asking her to marry him.
Queenie, is what she is doing normal?—Worried sister
Dear Sister,
Your brother’s girlfriend may need a “mother figure” because her own mother is out of the picture for some reason. Or she may think this is a way to get closer to your brother. Whatever the reason, it is up to your mother to cope with her.
Dear Queenie,
My husband and I have been married for more than 20 years and we have 2 children together, plus 2 each from our previous marriages. We all get along very well and the children are all grown up now and also doing well except for my husband’s daughter.
She never got married, but she has two children from 2 different fathers and neither of the fathers pays her child support. My husband sends her money every month to pay her rent and utility bills and help buy groceries and he tries to hide this from me because he knows I object to it because she has a good job and gets a good salary. Even so, she is always asking us for financial help because she buys herself and her children lots of fancy toys and expensive clothes.
I keep telling my husband that his daughter will never learn how to manage her money better if Daddy keeps paying for things, but he just keeps sending her money.
Queenie, my husband and I would like to retire, but we don’t have enough savings. What do you suggest?—Fed-up stepmother
Dear Stepmother,
As usual, I suggest professional counselling for you and your husband – so he can learn a better way to help his daughter and you can figure out a better way to cope with this situation.
Dear Queenie,
My first husband and I have a daughter who is now in primary school. We got divorced when she was less than a year old and he moved to another island. Since then he has had no contact with either of us.
I got married a couple of years ago and he has been a good father to her, and now we have a baby boy. My daughter loves her stepfather and her little brother, but she is curious about her own father and sometimes she asks me about him.
Queenie, I don’t want to tell her that her father just isn’t interested in her, but what should I tell her?—Worried Mother
Dear Mother,
Just tell her that her father is very busy and probably too busy to have any time for her, and remind her that she has a loving (step)father.
When she gets older, she probably will be able to use a computer to find her biological father on the Internet and if she does, I hope she is not disappointed by what she learns about him.
