Dear Queenie,
I’ve been invited to a wedding, but the bride told me that since I’m not in a committed relationship with anyone I cannot bring a date. I will know some of the people there but not very many and most of them are in the bridal party so they won’t be sitting with the other guests.
Queenie, isn’t this rather rude?—Wedding Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
No. The “plus one” option is up to the host of any event.
Instead of being miffed about this restriction, look at the occasion as an opportunity to catch up with the people you do know and to meet up with some new ones.
Perhaps being unattached will even prove to be an advantage if you happen to meet an attractive person of the opposite gender – who also will not have a “plus one” in tow.
Dear Queenie,
My wife cheated on me. She admitted it and I forgave her, but I can’t get it out of my mind.
I am not in love with her anymore and I’m only staying with her because of our children, but I’m getting more and more unhappy.
Queenie, should I stay in a marriage that no longer makes me happy or should I just give up and leave, and if so when?—Cuckolded
Dear Queenie,
My wife’s sisters are tremendously overweight, and I mean tremendous! That’s not a problem, but what is is that they stink. They have such terrible body odour that when they visit us it sticks to the furniture and hangs in the air even after they have left, not to mention how their own house smells.
Queenie, should we tell them about their problem? And what’s the best way to get rid of the stench?—Suffocated
Dear Suffocated,
Your sisters-in-law may have a medical problem that causes their body odour. Your wife should suggest to them that they talk to their doctor about it.
Meanwhile, cover your furniture with plastic, at least when they are going to visit you. And the next time there is a gift-giving occasion, fancy bath kits might be in order.
Dear Queenie,
My daughter who just graduated high school this year has been dating a man for a couple of years and now she is planning to move in with him instead of going to university.
This guy is not qualified for anything but low-paying jobs and even them he can’t hold onto because he is just plain lazy. There is no way he can support her and without a degree she will not be able to get a good job either. And what if she gets pregnant?
Queenie, how can we convince her she is making a big mistake?—Worried mother
Dear Worried,
I would be willing to bet that part of this man’s attraction for your daughter is that you do not like him – teenage rebellion at its worst.
Do not talk to her about him, or tell her she is making a mistake.
Instead, ask her how she will manage financially. Make it clear to her that if she moves in with this man she is on her own and you will not support her any longer.
Talk to her about her job prospects and earning ability without a degree. Show her how to budget what income she may have. Ask her what she will do if she gets pregnant – how she will get along financially if she cannot work and/or how she will be able to take care of a child and work at the same time – or how she plans to ensure that she does not have children.
And cross your fingers and pray that she is able to look at her future realistically.
Dear Queenie,
One of my friends just laughs when someone else bumps into something or trips and falls down. I think this is terribly rude. He says it’s to spare them embarrassment.
Queenie, who is right?—Good manners
Dear Good manners,
You are! There is nothing amusing about someone else’s mishap, even if they are not seriously injured. And it is only appropriate to be concerned about whether they are hurt. Your friend is either terribly immature or totally lacking in empathy.
You might ask him how he would feel if he fell and sprained an ankle or even broke a leg and you just stood there and laughed about it. And would he not be insulted to be laughed at?
