Dear Queenie,
I’ve been dating a woman whose husband died about 10 years ago, long before we met. Her adult children hate me because they say their mother is being unfaithful to their father’s memory.
Queenie, do they expect her to stay alone for the rest of her life?—Widow’s boyfriend
Dear Boyfriend,
This kind of reaction is not uncommon. These people need to be reminded – by their clergyperson, if possible and relevant – that marriage vows are “until death do us part.” When one spouse dies, the commitment ends.
Just for the record, statistics show that widow(er)s who have had happy marriages are most likely to (eventually) find new life partners. In that sense, their mother’s relationship with you is a tribute to their father rather than an offence against him.
