Dear Queenie,
My parents have always been careful about money, but now that my Dad has retired he has gotten downright stingy. He complains all the time about the cost of everything, even in public places. It’s embarrassing.
Queenie, how can I get him to lighten up?—Scrooge’s son
Dear Son,
Is it possible that your parents, now that Dad has retired, have less money to live on than they did before and, what with inflation, than they had expected to have in retirement?
If you can afford it, perhaps you could offer to help out, or even take over some of their expenses like utility bills. And if you cannot afford to do so, at least make certain that you do not cost them money they cannot afford; for example like taking them shopping in expensive stores or out to dinner at expensive restaurants and expecting them to pay their own way.
And learn from their example – start saving now for your own retirement.
Dear Queenie,
I’m a single woman living alone in a house in a nice neighbourhood. Sometimes a workman or other stranger will ask me if I live alone.
Queenie, how do I answer a question like that?—Spinster
Dear Spinster,
It used to be safe to tell the truth in such cases, just as it used not to be necessary to keep your doors closed and locked all the time, but times have changed. Nowadays, it would be better to lie, to tell the questioner you live with a boyfriend or male relative.
Better yet, it would be a good idea to have a dog (or more than one dog) – preferably large and aggressive-looking – in the house or roaming your yard and point it/them out to your interrogator.
Dear Queenie,
With a name like Queenie, I know you can help me. I just came home from being in Anguilla and attending Moonsplash, It was phenomenal!
Connis Vanderpool was there and I know your publication had done a story about him and the new CD. Could you please tell me of a store or website where I can purchase this CD?
Queenie, thank you so much in advance.—A.K.
Dear A.K.,
I am sorry, but I cannot help you. This is an advice column, not a shopping guide. Furthermore, I do not let my column be used to advertise any product or business.
Therefore, I have referred your request to this newspaper’s Advertising Department. I hope they will be able to help you.
Dear Queenie,
I’ve finished school and have to start supporting myself but I don’t know what kind of job I want to get.
Queenie, how do I figure out what I want to do with my life?—Undecided
Dear Undecided,
Does your school have a career guidance counsellor? If so, he (or she) might be able to help you figure this out.
If not, take any job you can get and see how you like it. If it suits you, fine. If not, do your best work while you look for another job, so that you will have a good résumé to show prospective employers.
Eventually you will find a line of work that pleases you – although you also may find that advanced education is needed, in which case you will have to support yourself while going back to school.
I wish you good luck in your search.
Dear Queenie,
After my husband died I had vases installed on the sides of his gravestone for the flowers I bring every time I visit his grave. But the next time I go, I see that someone else (I think it’s his mother) has put some other flowers in the vases along with mine and spoiled the whole arrangement, or simply dumped my flowers out and replaced them with their own.
Queenie, why do they do this and how can I get them to stop?—Grieving widow
