Dear Queenie,
When I got married my father couldn’t walk me down the aisle because he had to be away on business, something that came up at the last minute that he just had to take care of.
Now my brother is getting married and his fiancée’s father is dead so they have asked Dad to walk her down the aisle.
Queenie, I don’t think this is fair. If he couldn’t give me away how can he do the honours for my brother’s fiancée? Is it even proper for the groom’s father to give away the bride?—Jealous daughter
Dear Jealous,
It is not a matter of “giving away the bride,” it is just a matter of escorting her to the altar. Try to suppress your feelings of jealousy and be happy for your brother and his new wife.
Dear Queenie,
After my boyfriend and I had been together for a couple of months I found out he was cheating on me with his ex. I told him I knew about it and he told his ex to get lost and he came to me wanting to set a date to get married.
The problem is he keeps lying to me. He’ll tell me he’s spending the night at home chilling out but then he doesn’t answer his phone. Once I even stopped by to see him, but he wasn’t there. But he keeps talking about us getting married.
Queenie, should I stick it out or dump him?—Baffled
Dear Baffled,
By all means stick it out – if you want to spend your life being lied to and cheated on. It is not likely that your boyfriend will change his ways just because he has taken marriage vows. He already has shown that he will not – cannot – keep his promises.
Dear Queenie,
I’m in high school and I don’t want to play sports after school anymore because I have so much homework and there just isn’t time enough for everything. My parents say I have to do sports because I need the exercise, but I get plenty of exercise in the regular phys ed classes during school hours.
Queenie, how can I get my parents off my back?—Harassed teenager
Dear Harassed,
Explain the problem to your family physician and/or your school counsellor and ask them to explain your problem to your parents. Especially parents who do not have much, if any, secondary education may not be aware of how demanding such a curriculum can be. And even those who do have higher education may have forgotten, or may not realise how much more complicated things are nowadays.
Dear Queenie,
Why on earth do people take pictures of a dead loved one lying in their coffin at the funeral?
Queenie, why would they want to remember a loved one as a corpse?—Nauseated
Dear Nauseated,
I too find this rather gruesome.
I can understand viewing the body as a last opportunity to say “goodbye,” but I do not understand preserving that memory rather than how they were when alive. However, there’s no accounting for some people’s taste.
Dear Queenie,
I’ve been married for more than 20 years to a man who has ADHD and a much lower IQ than I have, according to tests he was given when he was still a minor He’s a good man and tries his best, but he just can’t seem to hold any kind of a job.
I have a college degree and a good job and it gets frustrating at times that I have to be the provider for the two of us and never could take time off to have a baby.
Queenie, how do I cope with this frustration?—Childless
Dear Childless,
If your marriage has lasted for more than 20 years either you have the patience of a saint or your husband is doing something right – making up in other ways for his inability to provide for you. Concentrate on the positive aspects of your marriage, not on your husband’s shortcomings.
