Doubtful

Dear Queenie,

After my husband died his brother and I comforted each other on our loss and after about a year we realized we had romantic feelings for each other and we began dating.

Queenie, is there anything wrong with this relationship?—Doubtful

Dear Doubtful,

The two of you are not related by blood, and no longer by marriage – there is good reason why marriage vows include the phrase “until death do us part.”
I wish both of you all the best.

Restaurant Etty Ket

Dear Queenie,

There’s group of us who meet every so often in a fast food place and sit at a table and visit for an hour or so without actually ordering anything to eat.

Queenie, I’m not sure it’s okay to take up the space. What do you think?—Restaurant Etty Ket

Dear Etty Ket,

Well, it depends. Do you at least order something to take out and visit while waiting for your order(s)? And are you taking up the space while other people are waiting for a table?

In any event, if the manager objects to what you are doing, I am sure he (or she) will let you know.

Fed up

Dear Queenie,

When my mother’s boyfriend’s son stays with us I have to share my bedroom with him and I’m expected to spend time with him and take him with me to whatever I’m going to do. He’s supposed to be visiting his father but his father is usually busy with his work or going out with his pals so it’s up to me to keep his son entertained.

The son is not the kind of person I would normally have as a friend and none of my friends know him, so I get stuck with him and miss out on whatever I otherwise would have been doing.

Queenie, this isn’t fair!—Fed up

Dear Fed up,

You are right, this is not fair to you – or to the other boy involved. Talk to you mother about it, and to her boyfriend if he is approachable. He is supposed to be interacting with his son, not using you as a babysitter.

Gift Etty Ket

Dear Queenie,

I have been invited to the wedding of 2 people who both have children from previous marriages. In addition to the usual gift registry, there was one for children’s things.

Queenie, is this something new?—Gift Etty Ket

Dear Etty Ket,

I have not heard of it before, but I suppose it is a good idea for a couple who have all the household items they need, but have growing children who need things they would rather receive.

Give them what you prefer. The registry is a suggestion, not an iron-clad order.

The other woman

Dear Queenie,

  I’ve been having an affair with a married man that I used to live with before he got married to someone else. I have asked him to leave his wife but he says it would have too many legal complications.

  Queenie, if I tell his wife do you think she will throw him out so I can have him?—The other woman

Dear Other woman,

  This man will never leave his wife for you. He wants to have his “cake” and eat it too, and it is very likely that even if she threw him out he would soon start cheating on you the same way he is now cheating on her.

  Send him home to his wife and start looking for a man who will deserve your love.

The Daily Herald

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