Dear Queenie,

  A few years ago my wife had too much to drink at a dinner party at a friend’s house and behaved very badly. It was not the first time this had happened and it was not the last.

  My friends still invite me to their parties, but not my wife. They tell me to come alone or not come at all, so I go alone, because my friends mean a lot to me. My wife says it’s okay with her, but I don’t feel right about it.

  Queenie, what to do?—Going alone

Dear Going alone,

  The fact that your wife behaves so badly when she has been drinking is huge evidence that her drinking is a problem. Continue to go to these events without her, but encourage her to get help with her problem. Professional counselling might help her. So could Alcoholics Anonymous – see the Agenda on page 2 of this newspaper for their contact information.

Dear Queenie,

  A while ago a relative of ours got married and we didn’t know what they might want or need, so we gave them a check for the money we would have spent on a gift.

  After the wedding we got a letter thanking us for the “generous donation.”

  Queenie, what kind of “thank you” note is that?!—Offended

Dear Offended,

  Technically, according to my dictionary, a “donation” is “something that is given to a charity”; that is, a type of gift. My guess is that your relative was trying to be humorous.

  At least you received a “thank you” note for your gift. Too many people, nowadays, are careless about sending them.

Dear Queenie,

  A friend of mine and I started a business together many years ago and his wife has been an employee in the business for a long time, ever since they got married, and she is important to the business running smoothly.

  When I got married a few years ago my wife started working in the business too, but she does not get along well with my friend’s wife and sometimes things get tense, which has a bad effect on how smoothly the business runs.

  Queenie, how can we put an end to this conflict?—Caught in the middle

Dear Caught,

  Explain to your wife that, much as you love her, the business provides your (and her!) livelihood and if she cannot learn to get along with your friend’s wife, who is essential to the business, it would be best if she finds another job.

Dear Queenie,

  For medical reasons I will never be able to have children. I wouldn’t talk about this on a first date, but someone I’m going with has a right to know.

  Queenie, how soon should I tell someone I’m dating about this?—Need to know when

Dear Need,

  Tell them when they mention the subject of having children.

  And if you have an online dating profile, mention it there. It will screen out anyone who wants children – and probably attract many who do not.