Dear Queenie,
What do you do or say when you know someone is lying to you?
Once someone started telling me something about an event that I know they were not at, because I was there and I know everyone else who was there and they were not. Besides, they were telling me about things that never happened at that event.
So, Queenie, what do you do in a case like that?—Truthful Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
I would end the conversation as quickly – and politely – as possible. And if the person is someone I think maybe I should be afraid of, I would get as far away from them as possible, and stay away from them from then on.
Dear Queenie,
There is something my boyfriend wants me to do when we have sex that I would find degrading. I understand that some people enjoy this sort of thing, but not me.
He doesn’t ask me for it anymore, but he still talks about it a lot.
I’m afraid if I don’t do what he wants it will make him think less of me, but if I do it I will think less of myself.
Queenie, what do you advise?—Worried girlfriend
Dear Girlfriend,
You should not have to do something in bed that does not give you pleasure, let alone makes you feel bad.
The next time your boyfriend starts talking about this particular sex act, change the subject to things you both enjoy doing in bed. Then suggest doing one of them.
Dear Queenie,
My best friend told me that her husband is constantly comparing her to me, about how good I am at everything I do, and one time when I messed up she laughed and said she would be sure to tell him about it so he wouldn’t think I was so perfect.
I thought we were good friends, but I’m not so sure now that I understand that she resents the way her husband talks about me, even though it’s not my fault.
Queenie, what do you think?—Offended friend
Dear Friend,
As long as your friend’s husband keeps comparing her to you, your friendship will suffer. You could ask him to stop doing so, but if he does not, you may have to forget about your friendship with his wife.
Dear Queenie,
Whenever I see or smell someone eating a cough drop I think how rude it is to do that in public.
Queenie, maybe if you tell them they will pay attention!—Annoyed
Dear Annoyed,
Eating a cough drop in public in itself is not rude. Some people have allergies that make them cough.
However, it is more than rude to go out in public if one is sick, especially these days. Even if what the person has is not COVID-19, they should stay at home with it.
Dear Queenie,
I’m all grown up and living on my own but I’m still afraid of the dark like when I was a kid. I always keep a light on, even when I’m sleeping, and when I have to go outside after dark I always carry a flashlight, but still it’s scary.
Queenie, what’s wrong with me?—Scaredy-cat
Dear Scaredy-cat,
This kind of irrational fear is called a phobia, and it almost certainly will take professional counselling to help you learn to deal with it and get over it. Ask your doctor to refer you to such a specialist.
