Dear Queenie,
I have a way of saying what is convenient in a conversation instead of telling the truth if the truth would just start an argument.
Recently I bought some rather expensive clothes and I knew my husband would put up a fuss about how much they cost so I told him I got them for a discount at a charity sale, but when the credit card bill came and he saw how much they really cost he got so mad and he said he can’t ever trust anything I ever say again. I’m pregnant and he even said how can he sure the baby is really his.
Queenie, I may have told lies, but I never cheated on him. How can I get him to trust me again?—Liar, liar, pants on fire
Dear Liar,
The question of your baby’s paternity can be settled with a DNA test – if you can get your husband to approve the cost.
However, regaining your husband’s trust will be more difficult. Whenever you feel the impulse to say anything other than the truth, stop, think about the problems being caught in this lie could cause you, and tell the truth.
I also suggest professional counselling for you to help you understand why you lie so much, and for both you and your husband (if you can persuade him to go with you) to help him understand your problem and to help the two of you together preserve your marriage.
