Ex-victim of bullying

Dear Queenie,

  Someone who used to pick on me when we were in grade school recently messaged me on Facebook saying they remembered me from school and wanted to apologize for how they treated me then. They asked if we could get together for coffee so they could apologize in person.

  Queenie, even if they mean what they say I don’t want anything to do with them. I’d like to tell them where to go and what to do when they get there, but I don’t want to be as rude to them as they were mean to me back then. How should I answer them?—Ex-victim of bullying

Dear Ex-victim,

  You do not have to answer them at all.

  It is possible that now that they are grown up they realise that what they did back then was wrong and they are trying to make themselves feel better by apologising. However, you have no obligation to accept their apology in person. Read their message(s) if you wish, or ignore them, whichever makes you feel better.