Dear Queenie,
Recently I find myself thinking of why the youth classifies a certain way of acting as black or white. I strongly believe that you should not describe a person by using a color or race. I am only 14 but this is a matter that is really bugging me.
My best friend came to me quite upset because someone she has known for a long time apparently believes she is white because of certain things she does and said she was becoming an “oreo” and that she was becoming stupid.
How can we tell whether being black or white is right? A lot of teenagers define black as the gangsters and white as just plain old dumb. If you really think about it, we are all shades of brown and acting should never be described the way like that. Too many barriers are forming between us.
Queenie, can you just tell me what’s really going on?—Bugged Youth
Dear Bugged Youth,
People who are uncertain of their own identities try to find security in being a member of a group and defining themselves by that group’s standards. The term “peer pressure” refers to this attitude.
If you concentrate on trying to live up, or down, to someone else’s opinion of you or if you define yourself by their approval or disapproval, you will waste time and energy, only to find that neither they nor you are satisfied with the result.
Trying to be “black” or “white” is never right. Be the best you can be for yourself, not for anyone else, and you can’t go wrong. The so-called friends who tell you otherwise are only trying to drag you down to make themselves feel big.
