Wedding gift Etty Ket

Dear Queenie,

  I’ve been invited to the wedding of an old friend who is marrying someone I do not like or approve of, and I won’t attend.

  Queenie, do I still have to send a gift? Wouldn’t that mean I approve of their marriage?—Wedding gift Etty Ket

Dear Etty Ket,

  A gift means you wish the happy couple well, not necessarily that you approve of what they are doing. If you do not attend the wedding you do not have to send a gift, although a congratulations card would be a nice gesture. But be sure to at least RSVP the invitation so they will know not to expect to see you at the ceremony.