Dear Queenie,
My son lets my grandson (his son) use the bathroom at the same time he does, like one shaving while the other is taking a shower, and his wife is the same way with their daughters.
Queenie, do you think this is proper?—Bathroom Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
This certainly does seem to be my week for Etty Ket questions!
To answer yours, I do not see anything improper about it. It is much the same thing as people of the same sex sharing a locker room at school or at the gym.
Dear Queenie,
I have a neighbour who will drop in any time to visit, even when it is clear that I have other company. I don’t want to be rude, but I do want to visit with whoever I’m with, especially family or friends, without anyone else butting in.
Queenie, what’s a polite way to handle this kind of thing?—Visiting Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
Just tell your neighbour, “Sorry, I am busy right now. Please come back (at whatever time you would not be displeased to see them).” That is as polite as an uninvited, unannounced drop-in deserves (even if you leave off the “Please come back” part).
Dear Queenie,
My wife and I come from two different countries and cultures with two very different types of people’s names. The problem is she wants to give our children her type of names and I want to give them mine, especially because they are normal where we live.
Queenie, how do we decide?—Father-to-be
Dear Father-to-be,
Why not do both – one kind of first name and the other kind of middle name? Your children probably will end up using whichever names they prefer – possibly depending on where they are at any given time.
Dear Queenie,
There’s this woman where I work who always interrupts a conversation if she’s not interested in what it’s about and starts talking about something else, usually something to do with herself or her family or her kids.
Queenie, you don’t have to tell me how rude this is, but how do you deal with it without being just as rude yourself?—Conversation Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
This woman seems extremely self-involved. I see no reason to worry about being polite to rude people. Feel free to interrupt her in turn, to tell her “Hey, you just interrupted me” and continue with whatever you were talking about before she interrupted you, or just turn your back on her and walk away.
Dear Queenie,
Sometimes when I’m eating in a restaurant someone will come up to me and want to shake hands to say hello.
I don’t like shaking hands when I’m eating because who knows where that other person’s hand has been and I’m handling food, especially if it’s something like chicken wings or French fries that you pick up with your fingers.
Queenie, how would you handle this?—Greasy fingers
Dear Greasy,
Just tell the person, “Sorry, I am eating French fries (or chicken wings or whatever) and my hands are all greasy.” Far from being offended, the other person probably will appreciate your consideration.
