Dear Queenie,

We went away to university when we were younger. Some of our friends from those days recently came to live near us. They still want to be friends, but we don’t, but we don’t want to hurt their feelings.

Queenie, what can we do?—All Grown Up Now

Dear Grown Up,

These people may have assumed they could renew their friendship with you when they moved nearby, and will keep it up until they find other, new friends.

Keep in limited contact with them, introduce them to as many other acquaintances as you can, and put them in contact with local social groups that share their interests. As they settle in and become acquainted they will depend less on you for social contact.

Dear Queenie,

I have been dating a woman who is not religious, but I am – very much. I have invited her to join me in going to church and she did a couple of times but she just isn’t interested in any religion.

She has talked about getting married but I am afraid of being married to someone who does not share my religious commitment.

Queenie, what do you think? Will she ever change?—Devout Christian

Dear Devout Christian,

If being with you has not made this woman more interested in a religious life, I doubt she will change with marriage. This would probably lead to considerable friction and I doubt you would be happy together in the long run.

 Dear Queenie,

My wife and I have been married for more than 20 years and our only problem is her mother. She calls my wife every Sunday to talk to her for a couple of hours.

I want us to have the weekends alone together, maybe sometimes take a trip somewhere, but there has to be this phone call from her mother, even if we go away. I even got a job where I work on Sunday so I would have something to do when they are busy with each other, but her mother started calling during the week too.

And now my father-in-law is dying from cancer, so her mother has serious problems and calls more often and talks even longer.

Queenie, do you have any suggestions?—Fed-up husband

Dear Husband,

Try to be kind and considerate to your mother-in-law during this difficult time she is going through. You could phone or even visit her, and maybe run an errand or two and/or stay with your father-in-law for a while to give her a break. But your wife has chosen not to put a limit on her phone calls, and that is not likely to change, especially now.

Dear Queenie,

I have noticed that these days a lot of people say the “f” word a lot, even in public.

Queenie, what do you think about all that?—Language Etty Ket

Dear Etty Ket,

I do not approve of using that word in public, and not even in private unless there is a very special reason for it.