Dear Queenie,

  My teenage grandchildren behave more like lovers than brother and sister. They hold hands, cuddle up with each other to watch TV, follow each other around and touch each other all the time.

  Their parents don’t seem to notice, but everyone else does and we think it is very strange and not very acceptable, and we can’t help wondering what goes on when the kids are alone together while their parents are at work.

  I think we should speak to their parents about this, but my wife doesn’t want to say anything to them for fear of causing a falling-out in the family.

  Queenie, what do you say?—Worried grandfather

Dear Grandfather,

  I think teenage children, especially those of opposite sexes, need careful supervision because the developing of their bodies and hormones can get them into serious trouble without it, even if they are brother and sister.

  Someone should have a serious talk with the parents – if not you or your wife, some other family member or friend who has seen what is going on, or even a school counsellor.

Dear Queenie,

  I have feelings for my friend’s girl that he is checking but not dealing and I don’t know how to act around them. He is my best friend.

  Queenie, what do I do?—Confused friend

Dear Friend,

  I suggest you do nothing for the time being, until you know for certain what your best friend’s intentions are regarding this girl. Eventually he will decide what he wants to do – or not do – about her.

  If he decides she is not for him, you will have a clear field to go ahead with her – if you still have feelings for her. If you do not, there will be no problem.

  On the other hand, if eventually he decides to go after her and you still have feelings for her, you will have to decide whether to become his rival for her affection or to give up any idea of going after her yourself.

  In the meantime, you will have the chance to think carefully about what you want to do in either eventuality.

  Let me add a further complication to this situation: Could it be that your best friend is aware of your feelings for this girl and feels the same way about you and her that you feel about him and her?

Dear Queenie,

  My boyfriend and I are in our 30s and we have been living together for about a year. Before we moved in together I told him very clearly that what I wanted in life was to get married and have children. He said he wanted the same things, but up to now there is no sign of our getting engaged, never mind getting married.

  My parents have invited his parents for several events and his parents invite me to similar occasions, but they don’t invite my parents, which he said they would do if we were married.

  Queenie, what am I supposed to think about all this?—Disappointed girlfriend

Dear Girlfriend,

  I don’t know what you are supposed to think, but it should be obvious to you by now that your boyfriend is in no hurry to make your relationship official, no matter what his parents may think about it (and apparently they do not approve of your living together without getting married).

  I think it is long past time for you to have a serious talk with your live-in boyfriend about your long-term goals – which for you means marriage and children. And I think you should do so right away, before the children you want start arriving without your being married to their father.

Dear Queenie,

  My wife and I moved to the island when I got a good job here. Every year when the time for our grandchildren’s birthdays comes around she gets homesick for where we used to live and starts talking about moving back there. She says I could get a good job back there.

  I like it here much better than where we used to live and I like my job here too and I don’t want to go back there except maybe to visit for a few days.

  Queenie, how can we work this out?—Harassed husband

Dear Husband,

  If you can afford it, perhaps your wife could go “back there” frequently to visit or even to live for part of the year near your grandchildren.

  As usual, I recommend professional counselling for the two of you together if you need more help than I can give you to work things out.