Dear Queenie,

  I have what I always thought was a good figure, with a slim waist and large breasts. Now I come to find out my boyfriend is turned on by boyish-looking women with flat chests and I understand why he isn’t physically attracted to me. I don’t understand why he stays with me if that’s how he feels.

  Queenie, should I break up with him?—Disheartened

Dear Disheartened,

  That depends on how important the physical side of your relationship is to you, and to him. You should talk this over with him to find out how much it matters to him. If both of you feel there is something missing from your relationship, yes, you should break up.

  And if you do, you probably will have no trouble finding someone who considers your figure gorgeous.

Dear Queenie,

  My grown-up daughter still lives with us and I would like her to move out because I am tired of picking up after her, but my husband, her father, won’t hear of it.

  Queenie, how can I get her to pick up after herself and persuade him that it is time for her to move out?—Fed-up mother

Dear Mother,

  If your daughter has a job, she should be paying you something for rent and should be helping out around the house, or at least picking up after herself.

  Assign her certain chores to do around the house, and if she does not do them tell your husband to do them for her or give you money to hire someone to help with the housekeeping, but do not do your daughter’s chores yourself.

  I am willing to bet that if your husband has to pitch in or pay for the work, he will be less willing to pamper his daughter.

Dear Queenie,

  My boyfriend has a lot more money than me. He pays for everything and won’t ever let me buy him a treat. He even pays some of my bills without me knowing about it and after we have been together I have even found money in my purse or my jacket pocket that I didn’t put there. If I admire something in a store or mention something I have seen that I liked, he will go and buy it for me.

  I know this sounds great, but it makes me feel like he thinks I am after his money and that I can’t take care of myself, when what I want is to contribute my fair share to our relationship, even if it isn’t as much money as he does.

  Queenie, how do I make him understand?—Not-broke girlfriend  

Dear Girlfriend,

  Your boyfriend seems to be very generous, but he does take things too far. Have you tried to explain to him how all this makes you feel? If not, do so at once, and more than once if necessary.

  If he still does not stop leaving money for you, insisting on paying for everything, buying you things and paying your bills, it may indicate that he has less respect for your feelings than you would like to believe, and likes feeling like a bigshot.

  And the next time you find money he has left for you, donate it to your favourite charity, or to his in his name, and tell him what you have done with the money.

Dear Queenie,

  My husband always has music playing at top volume while he is driving in the car. It hurts my ears and it’s embarrassing to have people staring at us because of it.

  I have asked him to turn down the volume but he just gives me an argument.

  Queenie, how can I persuade him?—Deafened wife

Dear Wife,

  If your husband ever fails to give right-of-way to an oncoming emergency vehicle (police or ambulance) because he does not hear its siren he may find himself in big legal trouble.

  Meanwhile, to protect your own hearing you can invest in earplugs to use when you drive with him (and whenever he has the music blasting).

  Also, your husband may have already damaged his own hearing and should have it checked by an audiologist (a hearing specialist) to be sure he does not damage it even more. And maybe if he needs and gets a hearing aid(s) he will not play the music so loud.