Dear Queenie,

  My husband’s son is getting married next year and his fiancée’s parents are planning the wedding. My husband’s ex-wife and her husband are inviting a lot of friends and relatives but we – the groom’s father and his wife – have not been asked if there is anyone we would like to invite and there are some people we would like to have come to the wedding.

  Queenie, would it be okay for us to ask if we can invite a few  people also?—Stepmother of the groom

Dear Stepmother,

  Yes, it would be okay to ask, especially if you are helping to pay for the wedding. If you are not already contributing, you should offer to pay for the guests you want to invite.

Dear Queenie,

  My husband helps around the house and he is great with our children, but when it comes to conversation he would rather just make out and he doesn’t understand why I don’t feel the same way.

  Queenie, why are men like that?—Turned-off wife

Dear Wife,

  Not all men are like that.

  Have you tried explaining to your husband what you like and do not like, and what it takes for him to “turn you on”? Be specific about what you want from him, and reward him promptly and thoroughly when you get it. Eventually he will get the idea – hopefully.

Dear Queenie,

  Last year my husband and I moved to a new country for his new job. I graduated from college with a business degree and had a good job in our old home, but there is no work for me here.

  I have always been the one to take care of the house and most of raising our children, in addition to working a full-time job, but now that I am not working my husband seems to think I am incompetent. He is always telling me what to do and how to do it, how to take care of the children, how to do the laundry, how to wash the dishes, you name it. If I don’t do things exactly his way he gets mad at me.

  I have tried to talk to him about this, but he just says I am making it all up.

  Queenie, how can I make him understand that I am just as competent as I was before we moved and I don’t need to be told how to do things?—Fed-up wife

Dear Wife,

  Your husband’s new job may be stressing him out so that he feels that he is not in control; or the fact that he is now the only source of income in your marriage may make him think he should be the “boss” in your home; or, if you are now living in a place where women are considered inferior, he may have been influenced by that attitude.

  If marriage counselling is available where you now live, go for it, with or without him. If not, perhaps you and the children should take a long vacation with your family back home to ease your stress.

Dear Queenie,

  When my boyfriend started his new business he said we should cool it for a while so he could concentrate on his work. I ended up staying at home alone while he was out partying with business associates and friends and we argued about it a lot. Then when we  planned to get together he just didn’t show up and I got mad and broke up with him and now I feel like I wasn’t good enough for him.

  Queenie, did I do the right thing?—Ex-girlfriend

Dear Ex-girlfriend,

  Yes. Your ex-boyfriend did not have the guts to break up with you, so he strung you along until you did the dirty work for him.

  Time will heal this wound, especially if you remember the other old saying “Time wounds all heels”!