"What you done to me
I swear to you it’s gonna come back like a boomerang
So perspective, right: It’s like two people standing facing each other and you drop a “6” in the middle of them, but the one person is actually seeing a “9”. It’s like two people both being on St. Martin but one is experiencing rain, so grabs an umbrella; and the other is experiencing sun, so grabs a hat.
They’re situations where multiple parties see the same thing differently. Whether based on upbringing or experiences or honestly stubbornness …lol. However, in these situations, it never HAS TO mean that one party is right and the other is wrong. It more than likely just means that an understanding needs to be had.
Real life experience loading…
I was talking to a friend the other day about “paying when people go out to eat”. Her perspective was based on upbringing and experiences. Mine was more so just based on experiences (and a little analytics…lol).
When she was growing up, she saw that whenever she and her dad went out with other people, he’d offer to pay the bill. That “nurturing” shaped her. It became a part of who she was. Experiences as well over the years taught her the same. Whenever she’d go out with a friend or go out on dates, the other person has always offered to pay for their meal. This is her perspective and it is not a bad one.
With me on the other hand, the situation is a little different. What I’ve experienced is a lot of family dinners where each family member pays their own bill. In terms of one-on-one outings (because I don’t really interact that much) if I’m out with someone, it’s usually a “date”. In those situations, I’d pay. Or if a client invited me out to a meeting, they’d pay (to compensate for my time).
But I’ve also had a lot of experiences where I’ve gone “Dutch” and split the bill, if I went out with a friend. This usually happens for two reasons: I think a lot. And I’ve heard numerous stories where women feel like if a man pays for their meal that he may feel “entitled to something in return”. I’ve also heard and have been in situations where, if a guy pays a bill or if I pay the bill, it comes across as “showing interest”. So in my head, it’s like “before this gyul thinks I’m trying to hit on her, let’s split this bill…” Lol.
Communicating would also be effective in those situations, but my brain is always ready to play it safe. Personally, I also don’t see anything wrong with my perspective. Some people would disagree with that, though.
I think what I wanted to do with this piece is cause you to think. I don’t want to put any ideas in your head. So tell me, thinking back on your own experiences or maybe even how you were raised, which perspective do you lean more towards (understanding that neither is wrong).
Again, communication plays such an important role in our existence as human beings. Cameron could go out with Girl A and split the bill and she feels offended. Cameron could go out with Girl B and try to pay the bill and she shuts it down. No two situations are the same. And if we’re not trying to learn and understand the individual sitting in front of us, then it doesn’t make sense to me.
But again, the question. Which do you identify with more?
*Yo, Siri, play Boomerang by Yebba*