“Have I told you lately that I love you?
Well, if I didn't, darlin', I'm sorry!
Did I reach out and hold you in my loving arms
Oh, when you needed me?”
The other night, I watched “Malcolm & Marie”.
There’s so much to unpack, but I guess I just want to keep it surface-level today. It was an amazing story and the cinematography was equally amazing. Dominique told me that the first time I watched the movie, I should really just try to focus on the story, but that proved to be a little bit harder than I anticipated. The visuals were just so dang good.
I mean the entire movie was shot on film, and when I say film, I mean “film-film” – like 1950s film. The composition, the angles, the contrast, everything was just spot-on and perfect. But as you can see, even now as I’m supposed to be talking about the story, I am getting caught up with the visuals. Lol.
I really feel like I need to watch it again, though. I find the story in some ways funny. I mean it’s real situations and things that actually happen in relationships, but the use of hyperboles to emphasize the highs and the lows was humorous. In a lot of ways, as well, it reminded me of a relationship, a personal relationship.
And I guess it did not remind me of the relationship because of the similarities, but more so because of the contrasts. They were bare and lay whatever was on their minds on the table, and as crazy or as hurtful as it might have seemed, it was in a lot of ways necessary. I think we have a tendency to feel that withholding the harsh truth from the people that we love, will somehow save the relationship; but in a lot of cases, it is those truths that go unsaid that cause the damage.
And I’m trying to do this without giving you guys any spoilers.
Watching the movie showed me in many ways where I lacked in certain areas over the last couple of years, but it also showed me where I’ve grown. I now have a greater ability to appreciate confrontation and I’ve learned that I don’t always have to be subtle in my approach. And the goal of confrontation or the goal of being brutally honest is never to inflict pain on the other person, but it’s more so to ensure that you are both on the same page. To ensure that you are not living scenarios in your head that this other person is not aware of.
As Valentine’s Day is approaching, I think this would be a great movie for couples to sit down and watch. Besides it just being a really great movie to enjoy, it can also double as a “teacher”. If your relationship is on the rough end, you can definitely see some approaches (please…with a grain of salt) on how you can address some of the elephants in the room. And I guess even if you’re on the sweet end of your relationship, there are teachable moments to help keep you there.
Love is a powerful thing. Most of us have experienced it in one way or another.
So how about we all find ways that we can love more effectively? Yeah…
*Yo, Siri, play I Forgot to Be Your Lover by William Bell*