Through Cam's Lens: Autumn Leaves

“Some write the songs that make the world cry

The same songs that used to bring them joy

How is it that we love the melody

Yet we don't see the cunning ploy?”

 The other day Cardo posted a status on Facebook asking everyone to describe their 2019 in two words. I didn’t even need to think about it; my two words were “Mother’s Milk.”

 Break it down, Cam. 

Okay, so the expression Mother’s Milk, dubbed by Elvis Harrigan, is an expression used when you’re shocked by something, or when you’re hit with the realization of a fact and you have to hold your chest. LOL. So, it’s basically a PG-13 version of “WTF” and “MC,” Hopefully those acronyms don’t fly straight over your heads.

 So, initially 2018 was crowned the “Worst Year of My Life.” It was a total defecate show and a chapter in the book that I’d never, ever want to reread or have anyone else read. *Shivers in disgust.* However, after careful examination, I have relieved 2018 of its crown and passed it down to 2019. This is where I would insert the upside-down smiling Emoji.

 Though 2019 was much less of a defecate show than 2018, boy did the end results leave me is so much more pain. How can I explain this without putting too much dirty laundry on the street?

 Okay. Even though 2018 was King Defecate, at the end of that year I’d learned so much. I’d learned so much about myself and life. I found the message in the mess, so to speak. Ohhhhhh, but 2019’s ending hurt like a Mother’s Milk. I lost something this year that I personally feel would’ve been the best thing ever, if I could’ve held on to it. Sheesh. (If you just said that everything happens for a reason, HUSH your mouth!)

 Like. Coming from the type of year that 2018 was, I was put in a perfect position to grow. I had hit a rock bottom with all the knowledge of how and why I’d got there. There was nowhere to go but up, and I had all the tools necessary and all the motivation needed to get there. Who would’ve thought that you could get so comfortable at rock bottom?

 Man, I made that shiiiii-spot my CRIB. I lived there. Threw parties. Barbecues. Game nights. Rock bottom became my road dog. Woof, woof. Then October 2, 2019, happened and fuuuuuu-nny enough, I’d realize that I wasted a perfect opportunity. A perfect chance. A perfect, urgh.

 I’d been given a rude awakening. Oh, so that’s what that feels like.

 Mother’s Milk.

 Needless to say (Did I use that expression already?), I got my defecate together.

 If I can take all of 2019 and sum it up into one lesson or expression, it would be - Whether you believe in God or the universe, what’s for you is not for you. What’s for you is available for you. The difference is that if you do what’s necessary and put in the work, you can attain what’s available for you. However, if you “play this thing” and reside at the rock’s bottom, then you can also lose out on what was available for you.

 I believe that individuals should set New Year Resolutions. Not just for the hype, but to give themselves some sort of direction moving into the new year. It’s great to sit down and evaluate the type of year you had and see how you can make some changes going forward. And, please, don’t be like me. Take every opportunity to grow seriously. Playing the ass is absolutely overrated.

 My resolutions for 2020 are: “As often as you can, make the best decision possible; find more/more effective ways to allow my life to positively impact the lives of others; snatch 265lbs and clean 335lbs; and don’t make this a year that the crown for Worst Year gets passed down.”

 I really wish you guys all the best for this New Year, man! Thanks for rocking with me and reading all my crazy pieces, LOL. AND vote for my for Best Photographer in the 2019 Best Of.

 God Speed!

 Oh..

 *Siri, play Autumn Leaves by Christon Gray*

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