Dear Queenie,
I always give my husband a gift on his birthday and make him a special meal with birthday cake for dessert, but he never does anything for me on my birthday. If I say anything to him about it he says he just forgot the date.
Queenie, is it silly of me to feel hurt that he can’t remember my birthday?—Annoyed wife
Dear Wife,
It is not silly, but you can help him to do better. A few weeks before your birthday, start mentioning to him that it is coming up and reminding him of the exact date. You could also mention something you might like to get as a birthday gift.
Then, on the day of your birthday, instead of cooking and serving dinner at home, take him out to a nice restaurant. If you make a reservation for the event, be sure to tell the person taking the reservation that it is your birthday, so they can make whatever special arrangements are customary at that restaurant. And when the bill comes, hand it to him and thank him for the nice celebration of your birthday.
Dear Queenie,
My best friend got a cell phone for her 15th birthday and now she never talks to me anymore, she is always on the phone.
Queenie, why is she treating me like this?—Hurt feelings
Dear Hurt feelings,
Like most teenagers, your friend is fascinated with something new. Ask her to show you how her phone works and hope that when you get one of your own you will become phone-bffs.
Meanwhile, try to make some new friends, preferably ones who also do not have phones of their own.
Dear Queenie,
What is the difference between the words “dinner” and “supper”? Or do they both mean the same thing?—Confused
Dear Confused,
“Dinner” refers to the main meal of the day, which most people have at the end of the day, but which could be served earlier, perhaps around noon. It also refers to a large formal banquet such as is served at a special occasion like a wedding, or on a holiday.
“Supper” refers to a lighter, less formal, meal eaten in the evening.
Dear Queenie,
There’s this man who is my best friend but my parents don’t approve of him because of the way he looks and dresses.
Queenie, I will go on seeing him no matter what they say, but how can I get them to stop putting him down?—Fed-up girlfriend
Dear Girlfriend,
If you are grown up and living on your own you have the right to choose your (boy)friends. Given time, your parents may learn to appreciate what kind of a man your friend is regardless of how he looks and dresses. Meanwhile, arguing with them about him will not do you any good, so try to avoid doing so.
Dear Queenie,
Our son will graduate from college in another country this year. We are planning to go to the graduation if we are allowed to travel to that place, but my mother wants to come with us and we don’t think that’s a good idea. She is not very healthy and constantly complains about her health problems. Also, she can’t walk very well and sometimes she falls down.
Queenie, how can we keep her from going?—Worried son
Dear Son,
If all the travel restrictions are still in place when you plan to travel, it may not be legally possible for you and your mother to travel, never mind her health problems.
Tell her you are worried about her health and safety if she tries to travel and offer to videotape the graduation ceremony for her. You may even be able to send it to her live, or the college may arrange to have it broadcast (live or recorded), so she can watch it from home.
