Dear Queenie,
I’m a girl who was taught to be polite and shake hands with someone when I’m introduced to them or meet up with them, but very often when the other person is an adult, especially if it’s a man, they will say, “Girls don’t shake hands,” and try to hug me. I don’t mind if it’s a relative or a friend or someone I know well, but I don’t like it from anyone else.
Queenie, how do I stop them from hugging me without being rude?—Offended
Dear Offended,
Step away from them, smile, and say (politely), “I would rather shake hands.” If they persist in trying to hug you, they are the ones who are being rude.
Dear Queenie,
I’m a single woman living alone and I have trouble meeting good men. I met a few online and a couple when I was at a bar or eating by myself at a restaurant, but all they wanted was someone to have sex with.
Queenie, where can I go to meet good men who will treat me well and maybe want more than just sex?—Searching in vain
Dear Searching,
Try asking your relatives, friends, and maybe even your colleagues at work (if you have a job) to introduce you to any single men they know. At least that way the men you meet will (hopefully) have good references. But be careful. Even some of these men will just be looking for sex partners.
Dear Queenie,
I used to hang out at a bar and meet up with friends or meet new people and make new friends, but these days with all the COVID restrictions it’s not so easy or so much fun to do that.
Queenie, how can I have a social life the way things are now?—Feeling lonesome
Dear Feeling lonesome,
You do not need to go to a bar – you do not even have to go out of your house – to meet new people who might become friends. Nowadays such things can be done online in chat rooms, by email and by cruising Internet dating sites. Just be careful, because there are a lot of scams and other creepy persons who will try to take advantage of you – but that is true in the real (physical) world too.
Dear Queenie,
We have a relative who is on the outs with one member of our family. We can’t decide whether or not to invite this person to family events for fear they will make problems and offend other members of the family, but we don’t want to offend this person’s parents and brothers and sisters by leaving this one out.
Queenie, what do you think?—Reluctant hosts
Dear Reluctant hosts,
Have a talk with this person’s parents and siblings, explain the problem and ask them if they think this person will behave properly. If they are not sure about it, tell them you will leave this one person out rather than risk having him (or her) cause a scene and offend your other guests.
Dear Queenie,
When my mother died I inherited some jewelery from her.
Queenie, is it okay or me to wear it around relatives on her side of the family who are still in mourning?—Young heiress
Dear Heiress,
You can wear the jewellery on appropriate occasions and if anyone recognises it and comments about your wearing it, just tell them wearing it makes you feel closer to your mother even though she is gone.
