Dear Queenie,
My boyfriend and I have been going together for a couple of years and my family and friends like him a lot and are expecting us to get married.
The thing is, I have changed a lot since we first got together and I just don’t want to be with him anymore. I’ll give things a while longer to make sure this isn’t just some temporary phase I’m going through, but I don’t think that’s what it is.
Queenie, I don’t want to hurt him and I don’t want to disappoint my family and friends, but what else can I do?—Fallen out of love
Dear Out of love,
Whatever you decide to do, your friends and family will cope with it.
But it is only fair for you to talk this over with your boyfriend as soon as possible, before he becomes even more attached to you than he already is. Together the two of you can work out how best to handle the breakup, if that is inevitable.
Dear Queenie,
My husband travels a lot for business and I don’t mind his being away so much but when he gets home the first thing he wants to do is get together with his friends.
I do miss him when he is away and I would like to have some time with him when he gets back before he goes out with anybody else.
Queenie, is that asking too much?—Lonely wife
Dear Lonely,
No, that is not asking too much. I do not mean he should not spend time with anyone else too, but as his wife you should come first. After all, why did he marry you if he does not want to spend time with you when he has the chance?
Dear Queenie,
I’ve been asked to be maid of honor at a friend’s wedding but my husband doesn’t want me to do it because he says it’s wrong for a married woman to be a maid of honor and besides it would mean I would be walked down the aisle by the best man and have my picture taken with him.
Queenie, should I listen to him or do it anyway?—Undecided
Dear Undecided,
Your husband is totally mistaken about it being wrong for a married woman to be a maid of honour at a wedding, although the term for such a situation probably should be “matron” of honour.
As for your walking down the aisle and being photographed with the best man, so what? The whole event will be so public that no one could possibly think any hanky-panky was going on and anyway, he will be right there to see everything
Dear Queenie,
I always send generous checks to my nieces and nephews for their birthdays and Christmas, but they never bother to even let me know they received them, never mind sending me a “thank you” note.
Queenie, I’m getting so disgusted I’m thinking of not sending any more gifts!—Fed up uncle
Dear Uncle,
I have a better idea. Send the cheques as usual, but “forget” to sign them. You will hear from the recipients very quickly, I assure you!
Dear Queenie,
After my father’s funeral some of the guests picked up the flowers they had sent to take them home. When I asked what was going on they said the flowers belonged to them because they had paid for them.
Queenie, were they right or were they very very rude?—Floral Etty Ket
Dear Etty Ket,
They were so far out of line that I cannot think of an appropriate word to describe it.
When a person sends flowers to someone for any kind of special occasion, be it a birthday or a funeral or whatever, the flowers, like any other gift, become the property of the recipient. Period. End of story!
