Dear Queenie,
My neighbours have a dog with the same name as our son. It gets confusing when they call their dog or we call our son.
Queenie, would we be wrong to ask them to change their dog’s name?—Annoyed mother
Dear Mother,
Not as wrong as they would be to ask you to change your son’s name, but still wrong. Surely your son (and the dog) can tell the difference between your voices and your neighbours’.
And how old is the dog, anyway? For sure they will not be calling their dog as long as you will be calling your son. Eventually there will be an end to the confusion.
Dear Queenie,
I happen to know that one of my classmates is cheating on his homework by having someone else do it for him. He gets better grades than I do and it’s not fair because I do my own work and he doesn’t.
Queenie, should I tell our teacher?—High school student
Dear Student,
I’m sure your teacher has noticed a difference between the quality of this other student’s homework and his classroom performance, especially on quizzes and examinations.
As long as you are being graded fairly for the work you do, what difference does it make what grades anyone else receives?
Dear Queenie,
A friend of mine told me she thought my sister’s daughter was being molested by the father of her best friend and I told my sister so she would not let my niece play at that girl’s house any more. Now the person who told me is mad at me for telling my sister what that person said to me in confidence.
Queenie, should I have held my tongue?—Worried aunt
Dear Aunt,
NO! Your niece’s safety was the most important thing to consider and the possibility that she was being abused needed to be checked out. If nothing came of the accusation, all well and good, but if it was true the abuse – and the abuser – had to be stopped sooner rather than later.
Dear Queenie,
I met a guy and went out with him and had a great time and he said he wanted to take me out again. A couple of days later he texted me and asked for my schedule so he could plan our next date, but after that I didn’t hear from him for more than a week until he sent me an e-mail apologising for not calling because he had the flu.
Queenie, couldn’t he have at least texted me or e-mailed that he was sick and would call when he got better? Should I give him another chance or just forget about him?—Ambivalent
Dear Ambivalent,
So while he was down with a fever and probably sick to his stomach as well, you think he should have had the fortitude to send text messages or e-mails on the way to the toilet to empty his stomach? Give me a break (and him too)!
Yes, give him a chance to show you what kind of person he is when he is in good health. You can decide after another date or two or three whether you want to go any further with him.
Dear Queenie,
My wife and I separated for a while a year or so ago and while we were separated I met another woman. We went out a few times, but she knew I was married and we never got close to each other or even kissed or made out.
Then my wife and I got back together and we are trying to make our marriage work but I have been keeping in touch with the other woman just in case things don’t work out.
Queenie, is this cheating?—Just wondering
Dear Wondering,
Of course it is a form of cheating. There is a reason the phrase “forsaking all others” is part of your wedding vows. If you really want to make your marriage work, you will make a complete commitment to your wife and forget about “hedging your bets.” And hope your wife does not find out about your “just in case” friend.
